thatlibbychick | 076 // with memories returned

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076 // with memories returned

At least I remember who it is in the photograph now, and I can say with complete satisfaction: I dated that. And I do indeed love him.

Ruby, how are you?

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[She doesn't want to hear this. She wants to stay in her safe little "I'm a monster and that'll nothing will ever change" place and withdraw from everyone and everything. She just stares at Libby with the blankest face she can manage before averting her gaze.]

[And Libby cups Ruby's chin gently and brings her gaze right back up again.]

You can't keep running away from this. I know a little about comfort in misery, Ruby, and I know why you want things to stay the way they are...why you're comfortable in your suffering. It's painful, and it's all-consuming, but it's the devil you know versus the one you don't--and change is frightening. I get that. But you're at a place now where persecution isn't your biggest problem. What you need to overcome right now is yourself--your fear of change, your desire to hide. It isn't optional.

I am here to help you with everything. You just need to make the effort, and then let me in. You're not alone.

Edited 2010-05-18 03:08 (UTC)

[Libby can see right through her and Ruby doesn't like it. It's different when Dean does it; he doesn't say things like this, or admit how alike they are. Hearing all this hurts, it shouldn't hurt, and Ruby's not as good at pushing it down as she had been in the past. She tries to keep her face neutral, but she can't, and her eyes start to water.]

Don't. Don't say that.

I'm saying it because it's true. You don't need to face this alone anymore. I''ll be here with you every step of the way.

[She doesn't break eye contact with Ruby, not even for a moment; it's important that she shows unwavering attention.]

You are not a monster, and I think facing that scares you. You're so used to being seen as one that you've come to agree, but you've come so far here. You are a legitimately good person, and all you need to do now is accept that.

I'm not a good person. I'm not any kind of person.

You're sentient and sapient. That is what makes personhood. Not 'race', or 'species', or whatever you want to call it. We have aliens here. Vampires. Mutants. Angels. You can't say that any of them are less than people, and you can't say it about yourself, either.

You are a good person. It's apparent to everyone; people are wondering why you haven't graduated yet. They're even positive you'll become a warden. Even if you don't want to sign on for that--it's your choice, not theirs--it's proof that others can see what you're hiding from. You just need to take the leap of believing in yourself.

[Ruby is so close to tears, but she's fighting it so hard. Demons aren't supposed to cry and she's done too much of it since she got here.] I don't know if I can.

You can, hon. You might not be able to see it now, but you have it in you. I promise you that.

[Libby wants to hug her, but she can't. Not yet. She has to remain participative for now, not maternal.]

I'll help you with everything...you just have to let me.

[She doesn't say anything to that. Truth be told, she doesn't know what to say. She's just trying not to break down.]

[Libby has only one thing to say.]

It's okay to cry, Ruby.

[She tries to harden her face, rather unsuccessfully.] Is not.

It can be very cathartic. [She gives her a little smile.]

I know because I do it all the time.

But- [She was about to say, "But you're human," but she gets the idea that wouldn't be the right thing to say.]

No 'buts'.

[She decides to let it go for now, because she has an idea that the conversation wouldn't lead anywhere helpful.]

Do you think you're ready to work on this with me?

[Sniffle.] I don't know.

Do you trust me?

Yeah.

I believe you're ready to take charge of this.

Okay.

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076 // with memories returned

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